Can people be too right for each other?

No relationship is perfect; that’s a given, but there are definitely couples that seem “perfect.” These are the couples I am talking about. We get into a relationship because we, obviously, enjoy sharing our time with someone else. We also want to grow and develop as a person with our significant other. This is done easiest when the two individuals share slightly different interests and hobbies hence why they (who ever “they” really is) say opposites attract. In no way am I saying the more opposite the people the more we’ll grow as people; there needs to be something initially that draws these people together – most likely a common interest or hobby. Each person in the relationship has to step outside of their comfort zones at times to appease their partner. Appease might not be the right word because at times we do want to step outside of our comfort zone because we want to try things our partner is interested in. Then again, there are the times we do them to simply appease the other person. These are the times we are forced to learn, become vulnerable, grow, make mistakes, become wiser, and develop into better people. The roles are often flip-flopped frequently so we get a chance to be on both ends of the situation — teaching and learning.  All in all, these experiences together enable us to bond and grow as a couple. The relationship becomes stronger as we grow as individuals.

If two people are too similar they don’t push each other. The relationship may be awesome, loving, and very healthy, but the individuals in the relationship may not get a chance to expand their views and knowledge. They get so used to doing the same things over and over and are very content doing just these things, but there is a lack of development. I keep using the word relationship and non-development like they’re bad things here. I am talking more about the people in the relationships. If relationships get redundant, we, and our minds, become stagnant as well. If you’re in a relationship and feel like you’re in a rut — go sign up for cooking classes, yoga, or simply take a vacation to a spot neither one of you has been to before. As great as we may think our relationships are, we must continue to grow as individuals as well. Take a step back and make sure this is happening for you; I will do the same.

It’s the Little Things

Most people enjoy hearing compliments; it makes them feel good about themselves. We go out on dates and immediately say/hear, “I love your outfit. You look so nice.” We get a smile on our face, maybe blush a little, and then move onto the next thing. We quickly forget about it because it’s a generic compliment. It’s easy to say and almost necessary. If you’re out with someone it’s safe to assume you’re attracted to that person (if not, you’ve got other issues) and there are a number of obvious physical characteristics you like –they have a nice smile, you like their eyes, you love their long blonde, curly hair, etc. I’m not saying we all need to take these things for granted and forget them because yes, it is nice to hear these things once and a while, but the real compliments are the little things. I want to hear how you get butterflies in your stomach before we hang out, how you like when I rub a certain part of your back, or how easy I am to talk to because I am simply a good listener. These are the things we don’t notice about ourselves because it’s impossible to realize we do certain things without them being brought to our attention. When you hear a compliment like that you subsequently think about it every time you do it from there on out, and each and every time it brings a smile to your face. These are the compliments that truly stand out and have a lasting impression. Think of something your significant other does that makes you smile; now go tell them.